A Liberating Perspective on the Past
At work, we often use an approach called phased implementation.
When a new project or requirement comes along, we usually don’t build the entire solution at once. Instead, we implement the solution in clearly defined phases that build on one another. Sometimes Phase 1 is simply a scaled-down version, an interim solution, or what is often called a minimum viable product (MVP). In later phases, we gradually refine it, add the missing pieces, and move toward the intended solution.
It’s a pragmatic way to work. It provides structure and prevents chaos. Rather than trying to solve everything at once, we focus on taking the next logical step.
This applies to projects and requirements of any size. No matter how overwhelming something seems at first, breaking it down into phases makes the complexity far more manageable. By the time we reach Phase 2, we’ve already gained knowledge and experience from Phase 1, which makes the next step easier.
I absolutely love this approach and the pragmatism that comes with it.
There is one point I especially want to emphasize: no one expects Phase 1 to reflect everything learned by Phase 3. That is not how things work—technically or operationally. We understand that each phase reflects the information and experience available at the time.
That brings me to a broader observation.
Life in Phases—and Why Dwelling on the Past Is Pointless
Life can be quite long if we’re lucky enough to live it fully. Let’s say I live to be 90. That’s a lot of time—and a lot of phases.
The first phase—childhood and adolescence—covers roughly the first 18 years of life. When you think about it, that’s a huge chunk of time. No wonder it has such a profound impact on us. During those years, we develop our first habits, beliefs, skills, insecurities, strengths, and weaknesses.
Next come the phases of adulthood and middle age, both of which build on the foundations laid earlier. If you’ve developed good work habits, discipline, or social skills, you enter adulthood with an advantage. If not, you may have to spend considerable time developing them later. Of course, luck—good or bad—can influence everything, sometimes dramatically, but generally speaking, we all continue to build on what came before.
Finally comes old age. At least as I imagine it, this is the phase when I get to enjoy the results of everything I’ve worked on throughout my life—not only financially, but also in terms of health, relationships, experiences, and memories.
The point is that each phase gives us time to build something and then improve on it in the next—just as we would in a project.
In that sense, the version of me from five or ten years ago no longer exists. That person knew less, had less experience, and understood the world differently.
That is why I find it pointless to dwell on past decisions—and why I keep reminding myself not to.
An Example from Work
A few years ago, I was considering a job change. I was doing quite well professionally, but I could no longer handle the pressure. Many people go through something similar.
I decided to quit before I had another job lined up. It isn’t something I would normally do or recommend, but it felt like the right decision at the time.
Luckily, things worked out. I found another job that was a better fit for me at that point in my life.
For quite some time afterward, I kept revisiting the decision. Should I have stayed longer? Should I have left earlier? Should I have approached it differently?
Looking back, I see all that second-guessing as a complete waste of energy.
Whenever those thoughts come back, I tell myself:
“Free up your mental energy for what’s right in front of you.”
Surprisingly, that works well.
That phase of my career is over. What matters now is the phase I’m in. It makes much more sense to focus on where I’m headed than to endlessly analyze a road I’ve already traveled.
An Example from Friendships
When I look back on my life, I see that many friendships belonged to a specific phase. Some lasted a few years; others grew out of a particular circumstance, shared interest, workplace, or stage of life.
I had a friend I spent a lot of time with when I was younger. Then we lost touch for many years. Years later, life somehow brought us back together, and we briefly reconnected. What surprised me was how little we had in common by then.
That was when I realized that losing touch years earlier had not been a misfortune. It was simply a natural consequence of our lives moving in different directions. Looking back, it was the right outcome.
Of course, it would be wonderful to have friends who remain part of your life into old age. But even if that doesn’t happen, there’s something beautiful about meeting people who become part of a particular chapter of your life.
I find that perspective incredibly liberating.
An Example from Health and Wellness
When I was around 30, I developed IBS—or, as I like to call it, “nervous bowel.”
I tried everything: changing my diet, consulting nutritionists, undergoing medical exams and colonoscopies, and trying countless other things. The test results kept coming back normal, yet the symptoms remained.
Over time, it began to feel almost normal.
Anyone who has dealt with IBS or something similar can probably relate.
Now, five years later, I can barely remember the last time I experienced severe symptoms. Slowly but surely, I learned what triggered them and what helped relieve them. There was no miracle cure or overnight solution.
The improvement came one step at a time.
If you had asked me back then, I probably would have told you that this was just how life was going to be forever.
But it wasn’t.
For me, progress came gradually through a phased approach shaped by trial and error. Looking back, every small adjustment contributed to where I am today.
An Example: Starting Something New
When I started this blog, I had no idea how to set one up or build an online presence.
I only knew two things:
- I wanted to write.
- I wanted to explore topics like this one.
So how was I going to approach it?
Phase 1
- Figure out what I actually want to write about.
- Write three draft posts and see how the process feels.
- Focus on observations about life and philosophical questions that genuinely interest me.
- Ask for feedback and see whether the writing resonates with people.
Phase 2
If I am happy with Phase 1:
- Buy a domain.
- Work on the design.
- Handle the legal and technical requirements.
- Use photos from my travels.
Phase 3
- Launch the blog.
- Get indexed by Google.
- Continue writing consistently.
- Keep building from there.
Phase 10
Maybe by then, I’ll have established a personal brand.
The point is, I don’t need to have Phase 10 figured out today.
Closing Thoughts
The older I get, the more I believe life becomes easier when we approach it in phases.
We understand this when it comes to projects. We accept that Phase 1 cannot include everything Phase 3 eventually will.
Yet when it comes to ourselves, we often do the exact opposite. We judge our past decisions based on knowledge we gained only years later.
The version of me who made those decisions no longer exists. At the time, I had different information, different experiences, and a different understanding of the world.
And perhaps that is why I find it increasingly pointless to dwell on the past. The phase is over. The lessons remain. The next phase is already underway.
Leave a Reply